Don't Look For Me

After my sister finished cutting the cake on her 18th birthday, she pouted and suggested we play hide-and-seek. Just before the blindfold went on, I saw her exchange a look with our parents. I did not think much of it. Not until I finished counting to one hundred, pulled off the blindfold, and found the entire villa empty. I called my parents again and again. Every call was cut off, so I opened social media. One minute earlier, my sister had posted a photo. In the photo, she and our parents were wearing sunglasses, lounging on beach chairs in Chesroy Isles. The caption read, 'Escaping the heat abroad with family. How nice!' I did not even need to check to know what my mother had commented. 'Don't tease her like that next time. She's already pitiful enough being ugly.' Except there would always be a next time. And every time would be worse than the last. I stared at the ocean in the photo. Then, all at once, I felt there was no need to feel wronged anymore. I turned off my phone and picked up my suitcase. There were three hours left before my flight overseas—before I cut ties with them for good. From now on, the three of them could enjoy themselves without me. Chapter 1 Family of Three My phone screen suddenly lit up. It was a video call from my mother. I tapped to answer. The screen filled with blinding sunlight, and the sound of waves crashed loudly in the background. My mother was wearing a wide sun hat. She angled the camera toward herself and smiled. "Ingrid," she said, "don't be upset that we didn't bring you. The beaches in Chesroy Isles all require bikinis. Imagine scaring people with that face of yours." My father's voice came from off-screen. "It's Nelly's 18th birthday this time, so we're letting her have her way. We'll bring you too when it's your birthday next." I looked at the three of them huddled together on the screen. "No need. I don't plan on celebrating my birthday ever again." There was a brief silence on the other end. The smile vanished from my mother's face. "We just went out to have some fun without telling you in advance. It's your sister's birthday. What's wrong with letting her have her way?" My father snatched the phone. "Ingrid Scott, we spent money raising you, and now you're putting on airs?" I stared at the finger he pointed straight at the camera. In all 18 years of my life, they had never once spent my birthday with me. Every year, the happiest person on my birthday was my sister. They would use my birthday as an excuse to buy her whatever limited-edition bag she wanted, while I could only eat what was left of her cake. My mother let out a cold snort beside him. I zipped up my suitcase. "That's why I won't celebrate anymore," I said evenly. My father suddenly burst into laughter, clapping my sister on the shoulder. "Nelly, looks like you win again. Your sister really is mad." My mother joined in. "Nelly, you win. Later, we'll stop by the duty-free shop. I'll buy you that Chanel bag you wanted." So they had made a bet. And I was the stake. They were betting on whether I would get angry after being left alone in the villa. After laughing, my father's expression turned cold again as he stared into the camera. "We'll be back this afternoon." I said nothing and hung up. 'So they haven't gone to Chesroy Isles at all. They're at a private beach in the same city, posting a fake location just to fool me.' I stared at the now-dark screen of my phone. When I was five, they had taken my sister, Natalie, and me to an amusement park. She said she wanted to play hide-and-seek. My mother pulled me behind a tree and blindfolded me. "Count to 100 before you open your eyes." I obediently closed my eyes and counted to 100. When I opened them, the park was packed with people, but they were nowhere to be found. I stood there and waited the entire day. … By nightfall, the park had closed, and security took me to the police station. Near midnight, my parents walked in, holding Natalie's hand as she clutched a stick of cotton candy. When the police asked where they had gone, my mother smiled and said, "Our daughter wanted roast chicken from the south side of the city, so we went to eat and forgot our other one was still at the park." That night, when we got home, my father beat me. "Why were you crying in front of the police? You made it look like we abused you!" From that day on, I knew I could never wait for them to come back for me. I turned the family photo of the three of them face-down on the table. Then, I picked up my suitcase and headed for the door. I had just reached the entryway when the door opened. My parents walked in with Natalie, who was wearing a floral dress. Their hands were full of shopping bags. Chapter 2 The Apology That Wasn't When my mother saw me standing by the door with a suitcase in hand, she froze for a moment. Then she set the cake box onto the shoe cabinet. "You actually packed your bags? Alright, enough of this act. Put the suitcase back." My father changed his shoes and walked over, kicking my suitcase. "This ends here, you hear me?" Natalie stepped forward and looped her arm through my mother's. "Iggy, don't be mad anymore. Mom and Dad knew they shouldn't have left you alone at the villa in the first place. See? They came back early just to apologize to you." My mother followed her lead. "Exactly. This is the first time we've ever apologized to you—be grateful. Come here; we even bought your favorite cake. Your sister doesn't even get this kind of treatment." Natalie pouted. "Yeah, Mom and Dad have never apologized to me before. Iggy, you're really something." My mother opened the cake box. It was a caramel cake covered in crushed peanuts—Natalie's favorite flavor. She cut a large slice, placed it on a paper plate, and held it out to me. "Here, eat." I looked at the cake but did not take it. "I'm not eating that." My mother's hand froze midair, her expression turning cold. "Ingrid, don't push your luck!" my father snapped as he strode over, snatching the plate from her hand and shoving it toward my face. "Eat what you're given! Don't stand there with that lifeless expression." I turned my head. The cake smeared against my cheek, and the cream stuck to my mask. I reached up and wiped it off. "I'm allergic to peanuts. Don't you know that?" The living room fell silent for a moment. My mother frowned. "Since when are you allergic to peanuts? Why don't I know about it?" Natalie muttered under her breath, "She's just being a drama queen. If you don't want to eat, just say so. Why make up excuses?" I stared at the crumbs scattered on the floor. When I was ten, Natalie had insisted on eating peanut butter blossoms, and my mother bought a whole box. I hadn't eaten all day and secretly took one. Ten minutes later, my body broke out in hives, my breathing turned labored, and I collapsed on the floor, gasping for air. When my mother saw me lying there, her first reaction was not concern. It was to check whether any of Natalie's snacks were missing. "Ingrid! How dare you steal your sister's food?" I clutched at her pant leg, my mouth open but unable to make a sound. Natalie cried beside her, throwing a tantrum. "She ate my peanut butter blossoms! I hate her!" My father kicked me aside. "Get back to your room! Don't stand here and annoy your sister!" I crawled back to my room and lay on the floor the entire night. The next day, the hives faded, and I survived. From then on, I never touched peanuts again. And they did not even remember that I had almost died. "I'll say it one more time—I'm allergic to peanuts," I emphasized, looking at them. "And on the day Nelly was born, Dad closed the biggest deal of his career, so you all said she was lucky. But on the day I was born, Grandpa died of a sudden heart attack, so the fortune teller said I was a curse." My mother waved her hand impatiently, though her gaze flickered slightly. "Alright, alright. So, you're allergic to peanuts. What's so impressive about that? And the fortune teller was right. You've been nothing but trouble since the day you were born. Now, clean this mess right away. Your uncle's family is coming over for dinner. Don't just stand here and be an eyesore." Natalie sat down on the sofa, pulled out her phone, and started editing photos. "Iggy, go cut some fruit. I'm thirsty." I tightened my grip on the suitcase handle. "I won't." My father whipped his head around and pointed at my nose. "Step out that door, and you'll be disowned!" "Alright." I nodded and dragged my suitcase toward the door. Just then, the doorbell rang. My mother went to open it, and my uncle and his family stood outside. "Hey, Andrew, we're here!" my aunt's loud voice echoed through the hallway. The moment she stepped inside, she saw me standing there with my suitcase. Chapter 3 Laughter at My Expense My aunt sized me up. "Well, Iggy, where are you off to with such a big suitcase? Running away from home?" Her children laughed along. My uncle walked in and set the fruit he brought onto the table. "Andrew, your daughter's got quite the temper these days." My father's face darkened. He strode over, grabbed my arm, and dragged me into the living room. "She's just throwing a tantrum. Sorry to let you all see this." My mother quickly ushered the relatives to sit. "Come, sit. Nelly, go pour your uncle and aunt some water." Natalie stood up obediently, her voice sweet and cheerful. "Uncle, Aunt, please have some water." My aunt took Natalie's hand, beaming. "Sensible as ever, Nelly—and so pretty, too. Not like a certain someone, always hiding behind a mask like she can't be seen." Her daughter leaned back on the sofa and glanced at me. "Iggy, you've been wearing that mask for over ten years, haven't you? Doesn't it feel suffocating? Take it off and let us see if you've gotten even uglier." Laughter erupted across the living room, and my mother sat there, laughing along. "With that face of hers? If she takes it off, you'll all lose your appetite. She'd better leave it on." I stood in the center of the room, like some kind of circus freak. I did not argue. I simply turned to pull my suitcase, but my father slapped the back of my hand. "Where do you think you're going?" Just then, Natalie pulled out a thick notebook from beneath a sofa cushion. It was my diary. Inside were all my plans for the future. My dream of getting into Columbus. "Uncle, look at this," she said with a laugh. "Isn't Ingrid ridiculous? She even wrote about making big money and leaving us. She even records every little expense on scraps of paper. How pathetic." My other cousin, Owen, snatched it from her hands and read aloud, his voice exaggerated. "I want to leave this place and go somewhere no one knows me…" When he finished, he burst out laughing. "With a face like yours, you'd get laughed at no matter where you go." Those were the words I had written in despair, each letter carved out in the dark—my only anchor. Now they had become the evening's entertainment. I looked at the relatives enjoying themselves on the sofa. At Natalie, who casually handed me a glass of water as if nothing had happened. At my parents, whose warning gazes silently told me not to make a scene. I let go of the suitcase handle. "Fine. I'll go prep the vegetables." As I turned and walked into the kitchen, my aunt's voice boomed from outside, "That's more like it. A girl shouldn't be so stubborn. If you're not pretty, you should at least work harder. Maybe then someone will be willing to marry you." My mother chimed in, "A husband? Her? Pigs would fly before anyone actually wants her!" I turned on the tap. Cold water rushed over my hands. I did not do anything. I just stood at the sink, staring out the window. 'Two and a half hours left.' Chapter 4 Leaving for Good When I returned to the living room, I walked straight toward my suitcase. Natalie followed closely behind me. "Dad! Mom! Iggy didn't do anything to the vegetables at all!" The relatives in the living room stopped talking at once and turned to look at me. Natalie hurried forward, grabbed the handle of my suitcase, and yanked it into the center of the room. With a loud thud, it toppled over. She pulled the zipper open roughly, and my clothes and books spilled out across the floor. "Look!" she called out. "She really packed everything! She even treats the old clothes I didn't want like treasures and wants to take them with her. So pathetic!" My aunt covered her mouth as she laughed. "Oh my, this girl's really committed to her show." Owen nudged the books on the floor with his foot. "Classic move. Crying, making a scene, threatening to run away. She probably just wants more pocket money." My mother's face turned grim with embarrassment. She rushed over and pointed at the mess on the floor. "Ingrid Scott, you're hell-bent on embarrassing me, aren't you? Clear up your junk now and get back to your room!" My father grabbed the ashtray from the table and hurled it at me. I did not dodge, and it struck my shoulder before shattering on the floor. "So, you think you've grown up now, do you? Showing me attitude in front of everyone?" He strode toward me and raised his hand to slap my face, but I caught his wrist firmly. He froze. In 18 years, this was the first time I had ever resisted. At that moment, Natalie raised her phone, the screen facing me. Voices overlapped noisily from it, and the display was filled with faces. "Ingrid, I just started a group video call," she said with a laugh. "I pulled in our high school classmates and teachers. Let everyone see how the top student in our class belabored her parents at home!" My whole body jolted as I looked at the screen. In the center frame sat Ms. Knight. In my senior year, when I could not afford the review materials and fainted from hunger on the track field, it was Ms. Knight who paid for my meals. She had told me, "Ingrid, knowledge changes fate. I believe in you. You'll make it out of here." In 18 years of darkness, she had been the only light I ever held onto. But now, on the other side of the screen, she frowned, her eyes filled with disgust. "Ingrid, you've disappointed me deeply," she said. "So what if you ranked first in the city? You have such poor character that you can't even respect the parents who raised you! Your sister said you bully her at home. I didn't believe it before. But now it seems your good grades can't hide your selfish nature. Apologize to your parents now! Don't run away from home and disgrace our high school!" My classmates chimed in one after another. "Exactly. Being ugly is one thing, but her heart's just as rotten." "She wears a mask every day pretending to be mysterious… Turns out she's just ungrateful!" Natalie held up the phone, laughing so hard she nearly doubled over. I looked at Ms. Knight on the screen, still lecturing me without pause. I looked at my parents and relatives, their faces full of glee at my humiliation. The dull, tearing pain in my chest suddenly vanished. I had always thought my parents simply favored my sister. But now I finally saw the truth. They had never treated me like a human being at all. I crouched down, picked up my documents and passport from the floor, and put them into my bag. The clothes and books—I left them behind. I stood up and looked at them. "You've always thought I was ugly, that I embarrassed you. Now that I'm leaving, you should be happy." Natalie sneered. "Leave? Where do you think you can go? Don't think we'll come looking for you. Even if you die out there, no one will care." I looked at her, then at Ms. Knight on the screen. "I waited long enough back at the amusement park." I turned and walked toward the front door. Behind me, my mother shouted, "Ingrid Scott, walk out that door today, and don't ever think about coming back! We didn't raise an ungrateful wretch like you!" I pulled the door open without looking back. "Fine by me." From now on, the three of them could enjoy themselves.