Application Approved: Officially Done with You

I'm a talker, while my boyfriend's a workaholic. He tells me I'm annoying, deletes me from his contacts, and blocks my number. If I want to reach him, I have to submit a request three hours in advance, and once it's approved, I get five minutes of his time. This is my 99th request to go see the Northern Lights. I'm just waiting for him to reject it so I can finally let this relationship go. But instead, the approval comes through. I spend an entire week putting together an itinerary and only ask him to book our flights. When I get to the airport, I receive a notification telling me to book my own ticket. I make excuses for him, tell myself he's busy with work. But after I land, I find him sitting with my best friend Becca Holloway, posing for one of those couple's portraits that takes a full hour to finish. He sees me and frowns. "So I didn't get your ticket. What's the big deal? "There were only two first-class seats left, and Becca has a bad back. She had to sit there." He says it like it's the most obvious thing in the world, then pushes the luggage beside him toward me. "Grab these, will you? Becca hurt her wrist, so she can't lift anything." The moment he finishes talking, he reaches up and takes out his hearing aid with practiced ease, cutting me off before I can say a word. Something in me just gives out. I take the sticky notes from my pocket and toss them in the trash. I plan to write down everything I want to say on them, so I won't waste his time. Now I don't need them anymore. Chapter 1 Compliments from strangers followed them everywhere. None of these people realized that the perfect couple they were admiring was my boyfriend and my best friend, while I trailed behind them, dragging my luggage like some kind of afterthought. Becca Holloway glanced back at me and gave Nolan Keller a light tap on the shoulder, her tone teasing. "Nolan, slow down a little. Fiona can barely keep up." Nolan stopped, his expression softening. "Come on, give me some of those. They're too heavy for you." Becca looked pleased. It was always like this. The last time I had a 102-degree fever, I called him from a different number. The moment he heard my voice, he cut me off and told me to submit a request first. The time before that, I couldn't take it anymore and stormed into his office to have it out with him. He just took out his hearing aid. In that moment, all the hurt just caught in my throat. It wasn't until Becca called him later and talked him down that he finally bothered to comfort me. "Fine, I hear you. It won't happen again." But it never changed. The car arrived. They climbed into the back seat and pulled the door shut behind them. "Fiona, what are you standing there for? You probably didn't sleep well on the plane. Sit up front and get some rest." Nolan pulled a sleep mask out of his bag and held it out to me. I looked at it, and something small and warm stirred in my chest. Maybe he did still care, even a little. But before I could reach for it, Becca let out a small gasp, and he yanked his hand back. The sleep mask tumbled to my feet. "What's wrong? Is your back acting up?" His eyes went soft with worry as he pressed his palm gently against her lower back, his touch steady and practiced. The heater was running, but a chill crept through me anyway. My mind drifted to two days ago. I'd spent the entire week working on the itinerary, and my back was killing me. I went back and forth for a long time before I finally asked him to rub it. He frowned and tossed his papers onto the desk. "Fiona Cole, who do you think you are, some kind of princess? What, do you need me to hire someone to take care of you?" I picked up the sleep mask without a word, put it on, and closed my eyes. It blocked out the glare of the sun, but it couldn't block out the voices drifting from the back seat. Nolan kept his voice low as he went over the plans with Becca. "You get cold easily, so I packed hand warmers for you. I already adjusted the camera settings, so we'll get great shots. "The observation point is up on the mountain. I brought a thick blanket, so you can sit on it while you watch the lights." He'd thought of everything, down to the last detail. But when I asked him before we left if there was anywhere he wanted to go, he told me he didn't care about that stuff and to just handle it. Behind the mask, my eyes still stung. I quietly unlocked my phone and deleted the request template. There was no point holding onto something useless. Chapter 2 At the hotel, I gave my information to the front desk. The receptionist checked the booking, then looked at the three of us with a polite smile. "Ma'am, you only reserved one room with two beds. Would you like to book a second room as well?" I glanced back at Becca, gesturing for her to hand over her ID. But Nolan had his arm around her, as if the answer should be obvious. "Becca's not feeling well. I'll take the double with her so I can keep an eye on her. You can get your own room." My grip on the suitcase handle tightened until my knuckles went white. "Nolan, I'm your girlfriend." A flicker of impatience crossed his face. "Fiona, she's your best friend. When did you get so petty? "This room has a better view and softer beds. She'll be more comfortable in it. You're tough; you've slept on a plywood cot before. A single room isn't going to kill you." Every word made it sound like I was the one being unreasonable. He took the key card from the front desk and walked toward the elevator without looking back. Becca tugged gently at his sleeve, looking faintly disapproving. "Nolan, you can't talk to Fiona like that." But he just ruffled the back of her hair. "It's fine. Once you're well-rested, we'll all have a better time." When he turned to look at me, every trace of warmth vanished from his face. "If you can't figure that out, stay here and think about it." The two of them walked off together, and I stood there alone. During the years Nolan was getting his business off the ground, I lived with him in a rental barely bigger than a parking space. That plywood cot was the best piece of furniture we owned. And now he was throwing it in my face. I'd lost count of how many times he'd left me to deal with everything on my own. It hadn't always been like this. He used to say that the silent treatment was the fastest way to kill a relationship, that communication was what mattered most. A tissue appeared in front of me. I looked up and met the worried eyes of the receptionist, and only then did I realize my cheeks were soaked with tears. That night, a knock came at my door. "Fiona, it's me." I got up and opened it. Nolan stood there holding a hot water bottle against his chest. "You didn't look good today. Your period's probably coming." The warm light from the hallway softened his features, and for a second, it almost felt like he loved me. He told me to lie down and pressed his hand against my stomach, rubbing gently. The warmth of his palm made me want to lean into it, just for a little longer. "Fiona, her back injury was my fault. That's why I've been looking after her more. Don't be jealous. "And the room thing, I only took the double because you're a light sleeper. I work late, and I'd just keep you up." Everything he said sounded so considerate, like it was all for my sake. The walls I'd just started building were already beginning to crack. The word "okay" sat right on the tip of my tongue. Then his next sentence knocked it right back down. "Get some sleep early tonight. That way you can head out in the morning to pick up pastries from Bellamy's. The line takes a few hours, and I don't want Becca waiting around hungry." His hand kept moving in the same slow circles, but the warmth against my skin suddenly felt like nothing at all. So that was why he came. I pulled away from his hand and quietly shifted to the other side of the bed. He paused for a moment but kept going. "Make sure you don't get anything too heavy. Becca's been trying to watch her weight. "And nothing too sweet either. It hurts her teeth." I lay there and listened. Since Becca came into the picture, this was the most he'd said to me at one time. My pillow was wet with tears. Chapter 3 A crack of thunder split the air outside. I grabbed the sheets beneath me on instinct, my whole body shaking. At the first rumble, Nolan was already on his feet and heading for the door. "It's storming. Becca doesn't know her way around here. I should go be with her." Just as his hand reached the door, I threw myself at him and buried my face in his chest. "Nolan, can you stay with me tonight? Just tonight, that's all I'm asking." Years ago, Dad brought his mistress into our home. Mom jumped from the roof on a night just like this, thunder and pouring rain. I was on my knees in the courtyard, watching her fall right in front of me. The rain was so heavy, but I could still see the red, bright and vivid, spreading across the ground. Nolan's hand froze on the door handle. He rarely saw me like this. Even when we fought, I mostly just swallowed it down and cried quietly. "Okay. I'll stay." He looked down and noticed I wasn't wearing slippers, then let out a soft sigh. He slid one hand under my knees and carried me to the bed. But a second later, his phone rang, and I recognized the ringtone he'd set for her. "Nolan, why aren't you in your room? I'm so scared..." "Don't be scared. I'm coming right now." His sleeve brushed past my fingertips, and the door slammed shut behind him. The storm didn't let up all night. In the morning, a sharp knock came at my door. "Fiona, open up." I dragged myself out of bed, my head still foggy. When I opened the door, a small part of me hoped he'd come because he was worried about me, that he'd rushed over first thing to make sure I was all right. "I called you over ten times. Why didn't you pick up? "I told you last night to go get breakfast for Becca. She's already awake and—" The rest of his words died when he got a good look at my face, drained of all color. Something like guilt flickered across his expression, but it lasted less than a second. Becca came down the hall, one hand braced against the wall, slightly hunched over. "Nolan, my stomach hurts." He was at her side immediately, then turned to me. "Go get Becca some breakfast, and stop by a pharmacy for something for her stomach." It was still raining outside, and none of us had an umbrella. Becca shook her head lightly, trying to stop him. "Nolan, just order delivery." His tone dropped, harder than usual. "In this weather, who knows how long that would take. It'll be faster if Fiona goes." Guilt flickered across Becca's face, but she didn't argue. I couldn't help thinking about the year after Mom died. I refused to talk to anyone and just sat in my room, staring at the walls. Becca was the one who showed up every few days with coffee and cakes, spending entire days sitting with me. And back when I was helping Nolan build his company, I wore the same clothes until they fell apart and patched them back together. Becca gave me every cent of her savings and made Nolan swear he'd treat me right for the rest of his life. I used to think I had everything, the perfect friendship and the perfect love. But somewhere along the way, I stopped being a priority to Nolan, and Becca became the only one who mattered to him. Something bitter twisted in my chest, but I pushed it down. "Okay. I'll go now." Compared to everything she'd done for me, I was just picking up breakfast and some medicine. Refusing would only make me look petty. I bought an umbrella, but the rain was coming down so hard it barely helped. By the time I made it back to the hotel, my pants were soaked through and my stomach was cramping with a dull, heavy ache. But the room was empty. They were already gone. Chapter 4 I dialed Nolan's number. The automated message reminded me that I'd been blocked a long time ago. With no other choice, I called Becca instead. Her voice came through with a note of surprise. "Oh, Fiona! We forgot to tell you. Nolan and I already went out to eat." By the time I rushed over, the table was nothing but picked-over scraps and cold plates. Nolan saw me and stood up. Something in my chest loosened, thinking maybe he was going to ask if I was cold, or why I'd taken so long. Instead, he walked straight past me and grabbed the rain-soaked plastic bag from my hand. His brow creased. "If you didn't want to get the medicine, you could've just said so instead of dragging your feet about it. What if it got damp and lost its potency?" One sentence, and whatever I'd just been hoping for felt laughable. Becca gave him a shove and moved to stand beside me. "Nolan, what's wrong with you? She's drenched." Nolan looked me up and down, then softened slightly. "Fine. You must be hungry. Go ahead and eat." But the moment I took the menu, my heart sank. I glanced around at the restaurant's interior and realized this was a seafood restaurant. I was severely allergic to seafood. I closed my eyes, a wave of exhaustion washing over me. "Nolan, I told you I'm allergic to seafood." A flash of embarrassment crossed his face, like it was only now coming back to him. Seafood used to never appear at our table. Then his gaze landed on the breakfast I'd bought, and his eyes lit up. "Perfect. Just eat that." I looked down at the pastries inside the bag. The paper packaging had soaked through in the rain, and the pastries were bloated with moisture. I could smell the damp from where I stood. And just minutes ago, he'd been scolding me for not keeping Becca's medicine dry. When I didn't respond, disappointment settled over his face. "You won't eat the seafood, and now you won't eat this either. "You used to share stale bread with me back in that rental, and you never complained once. When did you get so picky? "What, do you want us to find another restaurant and sit around waiting for you?" I stared at him as if I were looking at a stranger. So those years in the rental had given him the impression that that was all I deserved. Mom had left me money when she died, enough that I never would've had to worry. But I gave every last cent of it to Nolan as startup capital. I didn't argue. The light in my eyes just quietly went out. The fever that came was no surprise. What did surprise me was waking up to find Nolan sitting beside me. He had a damp cloth in his hand and was wiping my forehead over and over. When he saw my eyes open, there was reproach in his eyes, but for the first time it came from a place of worry. "You couldn't even bother drying your hair when you got back. And now look, you're the one who has to suffer through it." I studied his face. Honestly, I couldn't make sense of him anymore. "Nolan, what am I to you?" But before he could answer, Becca's voice rang out from the hall. "Nolan, we need to head out for the Northern Lights! If we miss it, who knows when the next chance will be." He stood up, and his eyes lingered on me for a moment, something uncertain flickering there. But he still grabbed his coat and left, tossing back one last thing. "Your medicine's on the nightstand. Don't forget to take it on time." I watched them leave. And somehow it didn't really matter whether he'd heard my question or not. I got up and started packing my bags. Then I booked a flight home.