What I Left Behind

After seven years of running a noodle shop near her university so I could support my girlfriend through graduate school, she finally earned her doctorate. It was her birthday. I closed the shop early to prepare a proposal, only to see her walk into the restaurant next door with a group of friends. Then my phone buzzed. "I have research tonight. I'll be home late, so go to bed without me." Something made me follow her inside. She was seated at the center of the group while everyone laughed and celebrated her birthday. I smiled and started toward her. Then the man beside my girlfriend stood, dropped to one knee, and held out a diamond ring. It was much larger than mine. "Nat, today is also our third anniversary. You've done so much for me over these three years, and I'm truly grateful. "You knew I had no money, so you quietly sent me eight hundred dollars every month. You knew I was proud, so you found me a part-time job instead of calling it charity. "My laptop, tablet, and every other device I own came from you. "Nat, I love you. Will you marry me?" Every drop of blood in my body seemed to freeze. I gave my girlfriend eight hundred dollars every month for living expenses. I had bought every one of her electronic devices, too, but each one somehow disappeared soon afterward. I had only smiled, told her it was fine, and bought another. When I learned that her classmate was struggling financially, I hired him at my shop without hesitation and paid him another eight hundred dollars a month. So that was the truth. All these years, I had not been supporting one graduate student. I had been supporting my girlfriend and her boyfriend. Chapter 1 "Of course I will, you idiot. I..." She never finished the sentence. A second later, as though she had sensed me, she looked in my direction. The rest of her words died in her throat. Our eyes met. Natalie Brooks shot to her feet so abruptly that she knocked over the bowl of dipping sauce in front of her. It splashed across her clothes. I walked over. I handed Natalie the napkins in my hand without saying a word. "Nat, who is this?" The classmates sitting nearby studied me with open curiosity. "Let me introduce him. This is Natalie's cousin." Caleb Monroe answered before she could, smiling as he greeted me. "They're very close. He's run a restaurant near campus for years so Natalie could focus on school." Understanding dawned immediately. Everyone looked at me again, this time with friendly enthusiasm. "Her cousin? Then sit down!" "Exactly. You're just in time to witness Natalie's big moment." From beginning to end, I kept my eyes on Natalie. She could not even bring herself to look back at me. "What about the ring? You haven't put it on yet! Finish proposing, Caleb! And you two still owe us a kiss!" The group began cheering again, driving the mood to a fever pitch. Perhaps Natalie was afraid I would make a scene. When no one was watching, she blinked rapidly at me in a silent attempt to calm me down. Then she stood. Amid the cheers, she held out her hand. Her gaze fell on the plain band already on her ring finger, and she hesitated for a second. The next moment, she pulled it off without hesitation and smiled as Caleb slid the sparkling new diamond onto her finger. She set the plain band carelessly beside a plate on the table. It was the promise ring I had made for her with an entire month's salary. "Hey, Nat, this old ring is actually pretty." A woman I did not know picked up the simple band and examined it. "You like it?" "Then you can have it." At that moment, Natalie was too busy admiring her new diamond to care that she had just given away the symbol of our relationship. "By the way, Daniel, Caleb said he wanted noodles this afternoon. Go make him a bowl and bring it over." As though she had only just remembered, Natalie looked up and issued the request in the most natural tone imaginable. After speaking, she blinked at me again, this time urging me to hurry. I was about to refuse. Then my phone rang. I had only just turned away when another wave of delighted shouting erupted behind me. "What just happened? Did Nat secretly kiss Caleb?" "She did! Didn't she always say she'd never dated anyone? Where did she learn to be that smooth?" "Kiss him again! Come on, one more!" Chapter 2 I stopped. Then I turned around. Natalie was hiding her blushing face behind one hand, but she had already leaned over and planted a quick kiss on Caleb's cheek. I had never seen her take the initiative like that before. "Keep moving. You're blocking the aisle!" The annoyed passerby's voice caught Natalie's attention, and she looked up instinctively. The woman who had been glowing with happiness a moment earlier sprang up and hurried toward me. She pulled me into an empty corner. "Why are you still here? Didn't I tell you to go back?" "Aren't you going to explain?" At that, she sighed helplessly, as though my question had given her a headache. "Explain what? "I keep telling you that your thinking is old-fashioned. See? There really is a generation gap between us. "It was only a joke." My eyes settled on the diamond on her ring finger as I asked quietly, "Was the ring a joke too?" Natalie's brow furrowed, and impatience crept into her eyes. "Daniel, why are you acting so unreasonable? "My friend liked the old ring, so I gave it to her. What's wrong with that? "Am I not even allowed to decide what happens to one ring?" I said nothing else. I simply turned to leave. Natalie caught my hand from behind and pulled something from her pocket. She quickly placed it in my palm. "Making noodles is hard on your hands, and the cold always cracks your skin. I saw this hand cream while I was shopping with friends the other day. Try it and see whether it helps." "There. Stop being angry." She gently swung my arm, her eyes bright. "They're calling me. I'm going back, so you head home first." I watched her hurry away and forced a smile, bitterness filling my eyes. I looked down at the hand cream. It smelled like citrus, the fragrance I hated most. Two small words were printed in the lower corner. "Free sample." At that moment, Ember Table was full of laughter and conversation. Only I stood apart, feeling exactly like the little tube in my hand. An unnecessary free sample. I tossed it into the nearest trash can. Then I walked out of the restaurant. Snow was falling. It was the first snow of the year in Bellmere, Franklin. I suddenly remembered what Natalie had said on my birthday as she held me with complete sincerity. "After the first snow this year, we'll file for our marriage license. I want to be with you forever." I walked into Hearthline Noodle House next door. For once, I climbed into the small storage loft and returned carrying a little box. It was filled with card after card. "Why are all the lights off?" Natalie came in supporting a drunken Caleb and flipped the switch. In an instant, the room filled with light. She carefully helped Caleb upstairs. After settling him in, she finally came back down, flushed and sweating. "Why are you suddenly digging through old memories in the middle of the night?" She stirred honey into warm water as she smiled at me. "Natalie, do you remember promising that we would get married after the first snow this year?" The world seemed to fall silent. She stopped stirring and scratched her head, visibly irritated. "Why are you in such a hurry?" I forced a smile and picked up one of the cards. "There would be no Natalie Brooks today without Daniel Simmerson. I swear I will never betray him. "Daniel Simmerson is the love of my life. We will always be together. "Natalie Brooks loves Daniel Simmerson forever, forever, forever..." "Enough. Stop reading those. I wrote them when I was young and stupid. They were just for fun. Why did you dig them out again?" Just for fun? I had abandoned everything and followed her because I believed those promises. "I will marry you, but not now. There are still important things I need to accomplish. "Don't be impatient." When I remained silent, she came closer and rested her hand over mine, trying to soothe me. "You..." Before Natalie could finish, a heavy thud came from upstairs. I had never seen such panic on her face. She rushed upstairs with the honey water and tripped in her haste. The glass shattered on the floor, and the fragments cut into her hand. Natalie had always feared pain, yet she seemed unable to feel it as she scrambled upstairs. Then I heard her comforting him in the gentlest voice. "Did you have a nightmare? "It's okay. I'm here. "Don't be afraid. I'll always stay with you." Chapter 3 For a moment, I drifted into the past. Once, she had treated me the same way. During the worst period of my life, nightmares kept me awake night after night. Natalie would hold me and whisper the same reassurances again and again. I knew too well what Natalie looked like when she loved someone. One glance was enough to tell me she loved somebody else now. I stood. Without hesitation, I dumped the entire box of cards into the trash. Then someone wrapped both arms around my leg from behind, and Caleb's drunken voice floated up to me. "If you're Nat's cousin, then you're family to me too. Daniel, you can trust me to take care of her. "I love her so much. We started dating three years ago, on May eighteenth. "We agreed that we would get married after the first snow this year. "Then we'll start trying for a baby. Nat never wanted children, but she changed her mind because I do. "Oh, and the cats. She's so busy, but she takes wonderful care of all my cats. Wait, I haven't fed them. I need to go home..." I had already decided to let her go, yet the words still made my heart jerk painfully. While I had been working in silence to build our future, she had already built another life with him. They had started dating on May eighteenth, the day I was hospitalized after being hit by a car while buying Natalie's favorite dessert. "There, there. We'll take care of the cats. You're drunk, sweetheart. Come back upstairs and rest." Barefoot, Natalie crouched in front of Caleb and coaxed him patiently. Then I heard her call to me. "Daniel, Caleb can't be left alone right now, so I need you to make a quick trip for us. "Here's the key to his apartment. Feed the cats, then come back." She pulled the key from her pocket with practiced ease and handed it to me. Then she lowered her head and continued soothing Caleb. At last, she noticed that I had not moved and looked up. She sighed before asking cautiously, "Are you angry again?" When I stayed silent, she smiled as though she understood everything. "What has gotten into you lately? You get upset over every little thing. "Go on. It won't take long." I accepted the key. Looking directly at her, I finally answered, "All right. "But Natalie, this will be the last time." The last thing I would ever do for her. Natalie did not even lift her head. She simply helped Caleb into a chair. Then she carefully held the honey water to his lips. Her response was absentminded. "Yes, yes, I know you love me. This is the last time." When I opened the door to Caleb's apartment, I froze at what I saw. There were 12 cats. Natalie had always claimed to hate cats. After my mother moved away, I had wanted to keep the cat she left behind as something to remember her by. Natalie refused and even stopped eating until I gave it away. And yet now, every cat wore a different necklace around its neck. Every one of those necklaces had once been a gift from me to Natalie. I raised my eyes. A large portrait hung on the wall. It was a figure study. The woman in it wore almost nothing, with only painted leaves covering the most intimate parts of her body. The woman was Natalie. The portrait was dated April 12, three years earlier, the day her family visited Bellmere and I spent the entire day showing them around the city. Chapter 4 When I returned to the noodle shop, I taped a printed notice to the front door. "BUSINESS FOR SALE." Natalie came downstairs wearing the revealing nightgown that had sat untouched at the bottom of a trunk for years. I had given it to her as a birthday present long ago. It had also caused our first serious argument. "What's this supposed to mean? How am I supposed to wear something this revealing? Is that really how you see me?" It had only been one item among everything I bought from her online wish list. After that, she buried the nightgown in storage. Now, red marks covered the skin above its neckline, and her hair was slightly disheveled. She seemed not to notice. She stood beside me with a puzzled expression. "What's going on? "Why are you selling the shop out of nowhere? Has business been bad lately? "I have some money saved. I can give it to you if you need it..." Her eyes looked genuinely concerned, but mine kept drifting toward the marks across her chest. At last, I spoke. "Natalie, we're done." The words struck like thunder. She stared at me for a long time without reacting. Finally, as though she had realized what I must be thinking, she tested an explanation. "You didn't misunderstand, did you? The marks on my neck are mosquito bites. "And nothing happened between Caleb and me. We're completely innocent. "He has helped me with a lot of things, but we're only friends. I..." Natalie seemed to have forgotten that the guiltier she felt, the faster she talked. "Excuse me, are you Mr. Simmerson? I have the birthday cake you ordered." The delivery driver interrupted her. Natalie's gaze landed on the cake. A moment later, she smiled and reached for my hand. "I knew it. That breakup nonsense was just something you said because you were angry. "You chose a beautiful cake. It's exactly the style I like." She took the cake from the driver, carried it inside, and opened the box herself. Then she cut a slice and began eating. A second later, she noticed something and pulled the ring from the cake. When she looked at me again, confidence filled her eyes. "Why threaten me with a breakup when you already prepared a ring? "Relax. I'll marry you." Yawning, she turned toward the stairs. "I need to take care of Caleb tonight. You'll have to find somewhere else to sleep." There was only one bedroom upstairs. I sat alone in the darkness through the entire night as the snow deepened outside. At first light, I finally picked up my phone and booked a flight home. When I passed the bedroom, I saw that Natalie's version of taking care of Caleb involved curling against his chest. His hand rested on her waist, and only then did I clearly see the matching tattoos along their sides. The tattoo on Natalie's waist had once been dedicated to me. Now a new design had been inked over it. I took a photograph, turned around, and went downstairs. By the time Natalie and Caleb came down, I had finished breakfast and was packing up the shop. "Why didn't you bring breakfast for us? "Why are you acting so strange this morning?" She glanced at the empty table and gave me an irritated, sleep-heavy look. I kept my back to her and continued working. Caleb came closer. He stopped beside me. "Daniel, let me help." "Don't bother, Caleb. I already talked to him last night. I have no idea what he's sulking about now. "What do you want to eat? I'll make something for you. How about the noodles from last time? I remember how much you liked them." "Hey, Nat! Look at this post. It suddenly started trending on the Bellmere Community Feed. "It says someone connected to our noodle shop is cheating and acting intimate with another person. They even posted pictures. This person looks like Daniel..." Before Caleb could finish, Natalie snatched the phone from his hand. The next second, she strode toward me and thrust the screen in my face, anger sharpening her features. "Daniel, don't you owe me an explanation?" I glanced lazily at the screen and answered in an even voice. "Look more carefully." "The evidence is right there. What else is there to examine?" She instinctively pulled the phone back and looked again. "What... what is this?"